This is who I am

Why is it that it's so easy to pretend everything is great.  That everything is perfect.  That we have it all together.  Why do I feel embarrassed to admit to those closest to me that I struggle.  That I fail.  That I am weary at times.  Why do we want our homes to be spotless when people come over?  Why do we try to hide who we really are?

I do not have it all together.  I fail daily.  My house has dust along the baseboards and laundry piled up.  When it looks like my house is all together, it's because my closet is full of junk.

There are times when my house is clean.  And there are times when dinner is hot and ready when my husband gets home.  There are also times when I am patient with my kids during the day.

In both of those scenarios, I need Jesus.  

E and G started sharing a room a few nights ago so that we are able to prepare for foster children.  We want them to get used to sharing a room.  For the most part, it's been great.  Except that they wake up 2 hours earlier than normal.

I immediately found myself blaming them this morning.  I woke up grumpy and unfortunately took it out on my kids.  Not their fault.   They didn't ask me to stay up late last night.  They didn't wake each other up on purpose.

We went downstairs to make breakfast and normally put on a show. This morning I decided that we should listen to music.  I have a playlist that consists of songs just about how much I need Jesus.  And this morning, I did.  All mornings I do.

Lord, please continue to remind me that you love me when I fail.  You love me when I am grumpy.  Help me to have patience with my kiddos.

I need thee.  O I need thee.  Every hour (minute, second) I need thee.

Once we finished breakfast, thankfully the mood was lifted.  Jesus laid a blanket of peace over our home this morning.  We started and finished school and it went smoothly.

We continued to talk about creation today.  I have known since I was a small child that God created everything.  But as a 33 year old teaching my daughter the same thing, I find myself overcome with emotion.  God created everything. Everything!  Me!  I am a daughter of the King!

Here are a few pictures of our day:

 E is so excited to see our seeds grow into flowers!  We have to wait 5 days!  I'm not sure she can.  :)

 Practicing cutting!  One of her favorite things to do. 

 I made E a patterns game out of Doc McStuffins characters.  I just printed them out and laminated them.  She loves it!  

We added days 3 and 4 to our book today.  She keeps asking if we can put our book together.  Just a few more days, sweet girl!

Thankful.  Blessed.

No comments:

Post a Comment